Bar Results

So MacDinton's was hopping in week one. We had an incredible crowd and I hope we can keep it up all season long. We are going to start keeping track of how teams do in their bar attendance and I will be awarding points in a completely arbitrary manner so that we can very unscientifically determine who the coolest team at the bar is.

Most of the teams had a pretty good showing at the bar, hell, even the Seminoles showed up to be social with the rest of the division so most teams will get 5 bar points this week.

Cleats and Clevage had a tough hill to climb but Jacqueline did a great job and really rallied the troops despite the fact that the team felt abandoned because Mike and Rachel decided to go on a date to see a musical rather than play kickball. Their utter lameness earns them only 3 bar points this week.

Quit Yer Pitchin and Who's Got Asstastic Balls also had an excellent showing at the bar. Meanwhile, my favorite threesome in all of kickball (the beautiful combination of Megan, Jeni and Kacie) represented their new team, Lick My Wet Cleat, like rockstars on the flip cup table. Each of those teams gets 10 points this week.

We've Got The Runs captain, Michelle, got up on stage to sing karaoke and perform I Wanna Sex You Up. Actually she didn't sing, the singing was done by her new recruit teammate (someone tell me what his name is), who actually did a really good job, while Michelle was just being pretty and acting like she wanted to be sexed up. They get 15 points this week.

99 Problems But A Pitch Ain't One had their entire team at the bar, except for the Blue Shoed Wonder who went home early, depressed at his poor performance during the game. It was also Heide's Birthday so she wore a Tiara all night and the former Marines on the team (Brandon and Tim) came up with the idea that for the rest of the season, if anyone makes a bad play in a game, after the play is over, that person has to drop and do 5 push-ups. Semper Fi, Marines. The Blue Shoed Wonder immediately went onto www.kickball.com's store to order himself a smaller t-shirt that he will need after losing weight by the end of the season from excessive push-ups. They get 20 points this week for having everyone at the bar.

Now on to the bad news. Not one player from Suck My Kick was seen at the bar. Next week, be sure to boo them incessantly for their failure to socialize after the game. They wear the Forest Green t-shirts. They get -10 points.

And just in case you don't remember that song:

To the uh... tick tock ya don't stop.